Sunday, September 18, 2011

longest exam period

initially, it looks promising. Most probably it's because of the gap between each paper, we can fully utilize it to regenerate physically and start on new revision. Not until i experience it myself, now i prefer a not-so-pack exam period. Optimum is exam once, rest another day or 2 days. Too many days like now very demotivating, especially you know previous paper is a total disaster. No matter how many days of rest, the emo-ness can drag until the last minute.

When it approaching next paper, i have to pack up my mood to study, these moods are such bad asses that can't just resolve in any second you desire. Seeing everyone in their lowest performance for revision, i can't help mainly coz i'm one of them. After calculated needing to achieve at least B- in last 3 papers, it kind of mixed feeling. Motivated due to no other choice but have to work my body all out. Fade up due to the down surrounding, for instance the mood isn't just smurfing there *urgh :/

i observe my friends that are attached, their results getting better than before, even better than me. All these obviously is the encouragement & pushing of the other half. For me, i thought of this few days back. If they have a human that can help them to succeed in their study, how about me that have a higher being that called me to be His child. Currently i just want to ask for determination, perseverance, strength to overcome this final examination period. Left alone problems such as christmas event, cell group, captain ball, publicity, t-shirt... Lord, i don't know what else to ask for, i'm just lost. I don't wish to underachieve this semester, which will lead me to loan-less in 3rd sem.

You delivered me before, many times that i took granted again and again. I pray that you can bring me and my housemates up, to face this challenge with confident & courage. Whatever past is about, the only things we are able to change is future, upcoming papers. May You keep us together, that we can help one another, give us hope that can overcome this calamities. Hereby want to surrender unto Your hands, nobody can do this alone, except You who can empower us. Keep the spirit until the end, He is with us, my mates. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Hari Kuning

I have been thinking a lot about this rally, especially the day before i was scrolling fb up and down, reading and watching all the news regarding bersih 2.0. As seems it's more important than my test on next day, just can't stop my mind off from this demonstration. Actually i came to contact this bersih thingy long time ago through watching the scary-malaysia-future-vid.

After observing for a day of how the media perceived this issue, wow i'm have never predict anything so accurate. They are real one bunch of bias scums. This rally was intended to demo peacefully and all the requests are simple and no harm. check:- If the authorities doesn't approve without valid reason and simply claimed it's illegal then the problems obviously come from themselves laa. Afraid to lose in next GE and got boot off, the worst is caught for minum rakyat's teh. All the sweet promises won't work in new generation, some more this rally brought up more dramatic scene. This demonstration initially held on street but Agong interfered and agreed to do in Stadium Merdeka. Who knows last minute the police and ministers broke their promise. Our 缩头龟 pm kept on pointing back police for all the responsibilities.  

Back to media, most of the news only cover the negative parts and some are untrue. See the headlines you will know, "protestants attack police with weapons and stone" WTH? based on all the witnesses and vid, the police 1st started it all and i don't see any police got their ass kicked. In fact, they fired tear gas, attacked hospital, water canon, arrest by force. Came across to protest happened in Bangladesh recently, both police forces should exchange their execution. Those bangla marched with a stick holding but we have nothing. Still, they used all kinda methods like facing rage people armed with weapons like 杀了你全家. More statements "5k-6k took part in rally" "no casualties reported" "organizer only want publicity". Hopefully no one will fall for these.

surprisingly i have a few friends joined. They are all christians and most of them have leadership qualities.  for me, prayer meeting helps a lot in updating everyone, though you are not interested, you gotta know your prayer request :p what david, my friend said somehow din't match this generation. I found that brothers and sisters in Christ put more concern in current issue than pre-believer friends. Sad case whenever i heard vote can't change a country. kudos to my friends who joined the rally, did a great job in advancing one step towards freedom. imma glad to see my fb wall were full of support for bersih, even some who doesn't look to bother about politics. foreign countries have showed their support too, there are still hope from US, Japan, Korea, Hong Kong, Australia, England, Singapore. Keep this up yo, its a long-term passionate to bring different into this land.

self-pondering, God control everything, so the rain definitely sent by Him to ease the people. Moreover, the wind blow the smoke back to the FRU, the rain drops clear the gas. It rained on the hour that least expected, 2-3++pm. In FES fb, people posted their own experience encountered in the rally. Every stories are touching and motivating, unlike what messages conveyed by mainstream. i don't know what's next but i'm pretty sure this protest has impacted malaysian, we need one another to rise up for a change!

Lord, you are the God of this city, you know whose hearts are righteous and serve the interest of the nation. May you lead us into way to claim this land for You. Amen


Wednesday, April 13, 2011

meaningful run

fb don't allow to save photo, now i know after attempted to save and post it here.. usually ppl say that doing charity is something meaningful, thats how my title comes from.. i do hope the library will benefit the ppl at tronoh mines.. meet the race, Volunteerism Run by PR campaign..

its all started when a few TMM members joined the race.. you know, we always need someone to initiate by participate in the race.. meanwhile, it's a good opportunity to create awareness among utarians, in addition a burden-less 4km run.. 

after all the waiting and delaying, the race flag off at 8.14am which is ridiculously late for what they planned to start at 7.00am.. i realize i have so much to improve in aspects like speed, strength, stamina after managed to squeezed in top 20, i assume based on the soft copy of ray's photo.. 

 in less than 2 weeks i will take part in bidor run.. seriously have to practice hard, no excuse if i want to hit < 2 hours timing.. work for it, i can do it!     

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

party night

bravo, i can barely remember when i had such crazy nite.. at first we thought it will be quite boring, only 4 of us ON.. text andy lau(wai sing) and found out his gang gonna party too.. whee~ we are not alone, some more got table for late-comers like us..

we drank jonnie black, 5 of us including fan xu.. yosh, everyone choosy liao, don't want drink beer haha Hit the dance floor a lots coz got chicks from andy's gang.. Belle was at there, a gal who i wanted to know since foundation sem 2.. Din't interact much but i attracted to her exotic blue dress with greek-style earrings and head band.. 

same night, i saw leow wei wei at club 9 while i were shaking on dance floor.. my secondary school's friend that i rated as school flower.. She din't change much except her hair dyed and curl.. I guess she saw me while i were having aftermath conversation outside, *get to know belle that time~ :D.. peculiarly i dreamed about her, coz my impression was till high school and bus so the setting was on bus.. 

things change and i prefer single even though most of my gang already in a relationship.. i will wait patiently and confirm for the moment to come..  

before party..
din't manage to take after party not because we were down but house mate was sleeping.. 

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

2 more hours to 6

apparently imma bored now in the middle of the night.. sleep? not so soon unless i have study.. recently quite hard to commit myself into doing stuff, lots of things.. feeling discourage >_< where have all my passions gone? i used to make myself present in every meeting, but now i constantly giving excuse. "i ady done something( big perhaps?) so time to rest, skipppp..." "i involved into something( big again?), they surely und why i absent"

i always suffer physically tired, not sure whether lazy or what.. i told myself even 21k can finished, how about lil stuff that doesn't require much energy.. can't let myself con't to be in this state, help me Lord~ lift me up, walk with me, i tired of being alone with pre-believers.. i know its God's will i stay with them at the beginning, as i join lesser activities and mix with bro n sis, i started to be like them *sad to say this.. i'm just wearing out.. everyday i insists to seek You, no matter how unwilling it is, hoping to find back what i had lost, can i?

i used to have joy and peace in doing anything.. what you see now is appearance only, in my heart only God knows what i'm going through.. im confuse about the causes of these.. lead me to see the hope, Jesus.. You're my only way.. i easy to lose out patient, teach me O' Lord to be gracious.. to content with what i have now..

Lord Jesus, may my mind be renew, heart refresh once again. You're my life, my comfort, provider. Let my eye see not only short term, of the hardships i'm having now but the bigger picture that comes from you, to build me up, grow more mature spiritually. Lord, your unfailing love can only satisfy my heart, none other things from this earth, and your love is for me, forever. Forgive me for self-condemnation, i thankful that i'm worthy in your sight, you will be with me until the end of the earth. In Jesus's name, amen.

turn your eye upon Jesus,
 look full in His wonderful face,
  and the things of the earth will grow strangely dim,
   in the light of His glory and grace.